Commitment issues

How many times have we blamed the other person for having 'commitment issues'? What if the commitment-phobe is you, er, me? If it's one thing that was in the back of my mind when I started this blog it was 'do I have commitment to this project?' I know I took a week off recently but I am dealing with current affairs in life which tend to distract me beyond the point of sitting in front of a computer and trying to sound intelligent and/or entertaining. Commitment has been both the core principal of my life as well as the bane of my existence.

Earlier I discussed how I started a bunch of activities and then one by one stopped enjoying them ergo ending my commitment to them, labeling myself the quitter in the shadow of the joiner. It's true, I am a stereotypical Gemini (if you are a believer in such things) who gets bored easily and makes more stops and starts than the TTC on a good day. This is a trait that to this day drives me more crazy than those around me. I always get derailed by something or other, only underlining the theory that there is no such thing as multi-tasking. How did I become so ADD? I blame technology.

But how does that relate to other areas of my life where commitment has also come into question, like relationships? You may not blame me for being gun-shy at this point in my life considering my romantic past. I've been committed for long periods of time and shorter periods but I have always been all 'in' until it stopped working for me, then I'm all 'out.' "You're never happy (satisfied) with what you have," is something I've heard more than once and I'm beginning to wonder if that indeed is true and if this handicap will be the cause of my downfall.

Self-satisfaction is a slippery slope when commitment becomes secondary. Striking a balance between the two has been easier for me in my career. People are surprised how long I've spent at each of my jobs. I've definitely dedicated myself of employers through thick and thin and only moving on when the situation didn't work best for either of us. Is applying that principal to other areas of my life acceptable? I tend to think so and will continue to take an objective stand point when faced with a commitment proposal no matter how trivial or serious it may be. No issue.